I Feared UNTIL……!!!

I feared being alone……….. Until I learned to like Myself. I feared failure………Until I realized that I only Fail when I don't try. I feared success…… Until I realized that I had to try in order to be happy with myself. I feared people's opinions……….Until I learned that people would have opinions about me anyway. I feared rejection………Until I learned to have faith in myself. I feared pain……………..Until I learned that it's necessary for growth I feared the truth……….Until I saw the ugliness in lies. I feared life……….Until I experienced its beauty. I feared death…………Until I realized that it's not an end, but a beginning. I feared my destiny……..Until I realized that I had the power to change my life. I feared hate……….Until I saw that it was nothing more than ignorance. I feared love……..Until it touched my heart, making the darkness fade into endless sunny days. I feared ridicule…………. Until I learned how to laugh at myself. I feared growing old………Until I realized that I gained wisdom every day. I feared the future………..Until I realized that Life just kept getting better. I feared the past ………..Until I realized that It could no longer hurt me. I feared the dark…….Until I saw the beauty of the starlight. I feared the light……Until I learned that the Truth would give me Strength. I feared change……Until I saw that even the most beautiful butterfly had to undergo a Metamorphosis before it could fly.

The Best Feeling Ever - Being Mother

What does it mean to be a mother? Becoming a mother is a process of finding your own strengths, says this deeply personal account. God cannot be with all of us and he sent his representative in the form of ‘Mother’ – caring, loving, inspirational, still as water, strong as rock, and everything to her kids. I always say that I understand my mother more only after being a mother. What does it take to be a Mother? I had no answers until I underwent the process of carrying a life within me and bringing that life into this world. It was on the 08th of March, 2014, that our little angel was supposed to make an entry into this world. But he didn’t turn up, thinking that it wasn’t an appropriate day. He was so eager to see this outer world so on 17th February 2014. I knew that he has decided to step into this world. What I feared the most during pregnancy was the painful labour, and now, it was actually happening to me! Those contractions, irregular, but sharp and painful, were preparing me mentally for the most painful and tumultuous event in my life. With the detectors on my belly which monitored her heartbeats, I was thinking about that day when I saw that faint pinkish line turning red, declaring my pregnancy – which left me surprised, excited, elated and confused. Has this really happened to me? Am I really pregnant? Am I ready for the baby? Will I really fare well? How will I deal with the labour pains? Coming back to reality, the contractions were getting regular and frequent.During my pregnancy, I never dared to watch any video of child-birth, and now I was actually undergoing one. I suddenly became concerned about me, my pain, and didn’t think about our baby… I met him after 9 long months on 17th February, 2014 and also met myself – stronger, tolerant and patient! Though the anguish and horror is soon forgotten when the baby is in your arms, labour pain is supposed to be the most painful event of a human life. I realised that I was lucky to have my mother an and father beside me, although I also wanted Sudeep ( my Husband) to be beside me, but as our son was so eager to come in this world so Sudeep did not able to turn up at same time, but I senced the tension over phone :) I love him, and love him a lot. Though I would like to thanx to my relatives who made hospital as home... :P It takes a lot of courage, patience, consistency, and determination to be a mother. Born once as a daughter and now born again as a Mother to our son – this time I survived the painful, witnessed the beauty of being a mother, and realized that I could dare to do all this only because I am a woman. I’m proud to be a woman.

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life." A post dedecate to my dear husband Sudeep :). Yes I am truly madly in love with you.”

Random Thoughts..!!!

There are many instances which we want to revisit in Life. We do that by recalling memories, the same instances brings smile, tears & a satisfaction over what you have lived. In the journey of life, you make acquaintances, friendship, relationship, love, commitment & sacrifices, need not be in the same order though. I always cherish the "Me" time, time with self. Introspection, just to ponder over thoughts which has been disturbing for a while. Sometimes I think I'm selfish.. Am I??? Well may be or may be not...!!! But aren't we all the same. We need right people at the right time. I call few when I am low, whom I might never call to share the greatest joy (For joy we just look to the person next to us because no one regrets being a part of it). I do the same. On every yearly occasion, like New Year, Birthdays, Valentines Day, Anniversary I look back over the past and wonder how I have improved. Have I learnt the lesson of being dependent on people & project myself to be independent enough? Relationships are part of life, few wanted, few unwanted & few categorized under Destiny. For me, every relationship which doesn't exist anymore falls under Destiny & I prefer to move on. Irrespective of realizing that few things, people & relationship are not meant in your life, you still shed tears, wonder why it happened in the first place if it was never meant to be? Why know each other when you have to turn strangers? Why crave for 1 moment of joy and ignore the 100 reasons to smile? We all do this, because Life is about Human for us & Human cannot live without expectations, be it even expecting your dog to run to you when you reach home & if doesn't you cant stop wondering why? Signs, intuitions, gut feelings that Something are Right, some induce fear & fright. Going through such numerous emotions everyday, every hour, we grow up, emotionally mature, learn to let go off certain things, people & relations which are not meant to be, embrace the moments which life throws at you. But whatever it be, I learnt one thing from life that "SHOW MUST GO ON"...!!

Some Unsaid words...!!

A lot of time has passed since my last post. It's not that I have forgotten this blog or don't have anything to write about. The truth is that I have around ten drafts but none complete. It's that phase of life when you want to say a lot of things but the words allure you. You think, you feel and open the page to type and then you go blank. The sea of feelings just drifts away leaving you empty. Life changes at every moment. Every moment you live and remember. Some have sweet memories while some bring tears to your eyes. Sometimes you snap the thread of a relationship while other times you try your best to bridge gaps, to bring people together. Once you learn to be that deeply trusting, it changes you. And you are never the same...!! I will try to be active again..:))

Promise yourself

Promise yourself that you will make the most of this priceless moment. Promise yourself you will direct your attention and your efforts toward those things that have real meaning and purpose.

Promise yourself that you will be yourself, in a truly loving, authentic and effective way, in all that you do. Promise yourself you won’t waste your valuable time on useless anger, resentment, envy or worry.

Remind yourself what an extraordinary opportunity you have on even the most ordinary of days. Show yourself how great and fulfilling life can be with the way you choose to live each moment.

Give yourself good and compelling reasons to get up each day and get going in a positive and productive manner. Give yourself great, wonderful, special dreams that are absolutely worth living for.

Allow yourself to see the value and beauty in every situation. Tell yourself, again and again, how fortunate you are to be able to zero in on the positive possibilities and use them to make a real difference in life.

Fill yourself with joy and enthusiasm as you greet each dawning day. And promise yourself to make each one rich and truly meaningful in your own unique way.

Do something about it

When something is troubling you, make the commitment to change it. Then begin to act on that decision right away.

Some of the influences in your life are under your control, and many of those influences are outside your control. Yet you can always decide upon and put into action a positive response to anything.

Don’t sit around being amazed at how miserable you are and at how unfairly life is treating you. Instead, be amazed at how quickly and effectively you can do something about it.

Don’t complain to others about how tough it is for you. Instead, inspire them with your positive and enthusiastic attitude and actions.

When the world feels all wrong, that’s a valuable signal. It’s your way of telling yourself to get going and make a difference.

You have plenty of good options if you’ll simply make the effort to find them. Pick the best one, get busy putting it into action, and take positive control of your world.